


Bust(er) a Nut

by jordypordy



Category: Super Smash Brothers
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Blow Jobs, M/M, Self-cest
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-07
Updated: 2016-12-07
Packaged: 2018-09-07 02:03:08
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,966
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8778820
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jordypordy/pseuds/jordypordy
Summary: Cloud takes the phrase "go fuck yourself" way too literally.





	

**Author's Note:**

> This started in October as a joke tweet I made about Super Smash Bros. being a prime AU for selfcest. I then took my own joke way, way too far. This is the result.
> 
> I am not a religious person, but I’d like to apologize to God and anyone who reads this from the bottom of my heart.

 

 

The heat between the two of them was almost palpable. They were both panting heavily, faces mere inches apart with a thin line of spittle connecting their lips. Cloud moaned as the man on top of him nipped at the nape of his neck gently. Through the haze of arousal, he tried to remember how he ended up in this bizarre situation.

 

How the hell did he wind up in bed with an almost exact replica of himself?

 

* * *

 

 

The day had started normally enough. Cloud had decided the night before that he would spar against himself for training. That was a cool feature that the Smash Manor had available to the fighters: to get a better understanding of their own fighting styles, clones were available for sparring. No one knew how it was possible, and no one really wanted to ask.

 

The cool things about the clones though is that they weren’t robots or holograms or anything like that. They were real, physical copies of the fighters; they shared the same memories, personalities likes and dislikes of the characters they are copying. After a spar, it wasn’t uncommon for the two combatants to sit down and chat. It was a more literal form of talking to yourself, but many found it therapeutic to converse with someone who _truly_ understood their life experiences. It was especially comforting for characters who only had one representative of their series in _Smash Bros_.- it helped with loneliness.

 

Cloud was particularly fond of his copy. Donned in his _Advent Children_ outfit (as all clones were pallet swaps), Cloud had taken to calling him Advent. It kept things simple.

 

One day, after a particularly rigorous training session (in which Cloud emerged victorious) in Green Hill Zone, the two decided to go for a stroll. They very rarely sparred anywhere other than Midgar because they both appreciated the sense of familiarity, but they occasionally fought elsewhere. Castle Siege was a favorite of the two. The only stages they actively avoided were Pirate Ship and Skyworld; all others were viable options. Why they decided on Green Hill Zone, neither of them knew.

“That was some nice fighting,” Advent casually remarked as the pair stopped to rest under the shade of one of Green Hill’s many palm trees. “I can tell you’ve been practicing.”

 

“The better I get, the better you get too. You know that.” Cloud chuckled. He took a seat on the ground. The grass felt soft to the touch in between his fingers.

 

“True, true.” Advent agreed, following Cloud’s lead. He rested against the trunk of the tree and smirked. “This is the first time we’ve fought since we were declared top tier, right?”

 

Cloud nodded, crossing his legs to sit crisscross. “Still feels weird be on top. I mean, I feel bad for Bayonetta.” He frowned slightly, remembering how distraught she had been upon learning that she was being nerfed.

 

“Yeah, it kinda feels like we didn’t earn it.” Advent took the words right out of Cloud’s mouth. The two remained in silence after that, but it wasn’t uncomfortable. Cloud appreciated Advent’s company more than almost anyone else in the manor. It’s not like he didn’t have any friends to spend time with when he wasn’t fighting, but being able to talk to someone who actually understands all the trials he’s been through is nice.

 

“What’s it like in the mansion?” Advent broke the silence suddenly. Cloud tilted his head in confusion, and Advent elaborated. “Well, I’ve never been it before. Once you leave the stage I just kind of _poof_ ” he made a motion with his fingers, “and I’m gone until the next time you put in a request for a self-spar.”

 

Taken aback, it took Cloud a moment to answer. He had never really thought about what happened to his friend when he left. “Poof?” He repeated the word, and felt rather silly for doing so. “What do you mean?”

 

“Hmm.” Advent closed his eyes in thought. “How do I explain this? When you leave, my consciousness is transported to some sort of void and I lose my physical form. I kind of exist in a haze, half asleep until you fully wake me up. Kind of how we felt floating in the Lifestream.” He looked at the horror lining Cloud’s face and quickly added, “It’s not bad at all! It doesn’t hurt or anything.”

 

“Wow.” It was all Cloud could say. He felt kind of bad for never even considering what the existence of his clone was like without him around.

 

“You never answered my question.” Advent chided him playfully. “What’s it like in mansion?”

 

“Well,” the words poured from Cloud’s mouth before he even realized what he was saying, “why don’t you come with me and I can show you?”

 

Excitement alit in his replica’s eyes. “Really? How would that even work? I cease to exist the moment you leave.” As he said the words, the excitement died down and an almost sad look replaced it.

 

The solution was simple really, Cloud realized. “You just enter the Subspace Door before me. Easy.” If Cloud left _after_ Advent, there was a chance that he wouldn’t dissipate. Hopefully.

 

“That sounds crazy enough to work.” Advent nodded in agreement. “It doesn’t hurt to try, at the very least.”

 

The end of Advent’s sentence was drowned out by a loud _boom_ followed by a gust of wind so powerful it would have knocked the Clouds over had they been standing. Two blue streaks raced by them, kicking up dust and leaves as they ran. Sonic was racing himself again even though his clone could run the exact same speed as him. Cloud suddenly remembered why Green Hill Zone wasn’t a very popular sparring location among the fighters.

 

Standing up, Cloud ran his hand through his hair, removing a stray leaf as he did so. “I think that’s our cue to leave.” He walked over to his partner, grabbed his hand and helped him to his feet.

 

A door appeared next to them, large and glowing a faint bluish purple color. A Subspace Door. These interdimensional doors could warp fighters to and from stages, special fights, the Multi Man stadium and everywhere else in between. Nobody knew exactly how, but they seemed to appear the moment the combatants wanted them to. Just one of the many mysteries the Smash Manor held.

 

Cloud opened the door and stepped aside, motioning for Advent to step through. “Here’s hoping this works.”

 

Cloud waited for Advent to completely disappear in the white light the door emitted before stepping through himself. He emerged in a sterile looking white room with monitors and terminals scattered around. The Stage Select room. Here, fighters could choose the stage they wanted to fight on and issue formal challenges against other residents of the mansion. Cloud made a mental note to check his inbox at some point in the future.

 

He jumped when he suddenly felt a hand on his shoulder. He almost drew the Buster Sword as he spun around to face the culprit until he saw his own face grinning widely at him. “It worked!” He was almost laughing with excitement, and Cloud couldn’t help be amused.

 

“Well,” Cloud said, removing his hand from the Buster Sword’s hilt, “I may as well show you my room first.” He had thought about introducing him to his closest friend in the manor, Shulk, but remembered that he had told Cloud he would be busy training with Lucina today. Maybe some other time.

 

They walked through the halls of the manor in silence, their footsteps echoing up and down the walls. Cloud found himself grateful they didn’t run into anyone on their way to his room.

 

“Here we are.” Cloud announced unceremoniously as they stopped in front of a door. He placed a finger on a device near the door handle. It beeped softly and he heard the door unlock. Every fighter who had fingers had a fingerprint lock on their door. He realized he didn’t know what fighters like Mr. Game & Watch did to get into their rooms.

 

“Home sweet home.” He opened the door and let Advent enter first. Cloud closed the door behind him as he followed his clone into the room.

 

Cloud was taken aback by how dark it had gotten; the room was pitch black. Had he really been with Advent for that long? Shrugging, he turned on a lantern near his bed, casting a warm glow over the room.

 

“This…” Advent started in awe, “this is an exact replica of our room in Edge.” His mouth was slightly agape and his eyes darted around.

 

“Yeah,” Cloud chuckled, removing the Buster Sword from its magnetic holder on his back, “I was surprised at first too.” He walked over the closet he kept his pallet swap outfits and was slightly shocked when the Fusion Sword wasn’t where it normally was. His standard _Advent Children_ cloak wasn’t there either. It took him longer than he would like to admit to realize that they weren’t there because his guest was using them. “Interesting…” he muttered to himself as he placed his sword gently against the wall.

 

When he returned his attention to Advent, he was holding the Chocobo trophy in his hand. His blade wasn’t in its holder and Cloud noticed it sitting atop a dresser.

 

“Everything is here.” He whispered in amazement. “The trophy, the Materia bin, Denzel and Marlene’s drawings.”

 

Cloud was about to comment when Advent suddenly sniffed loudly. “Is that… Tifa’s cooking?” Cloud took a sniff and sure enough, the unmistakable scent of a meal wafted through the room.

 

“Yeah, that happens sometimes.” He kicked off his boots and sat on his bed. “It’s always a pleasant surprise when it does.”

 

Advent placed the Chocobo trophy back down on the desk and took a seat besides Cloud. He leaned his head bac”k to stare at the ceiling and used his arms to support himself. “Do you ever miss her?” He asked.

 

What an odd question. “Well of course I do, I miss everyone.” He said simply.

 

“No I mean, do you _miss_ her? Like as more than a friend?”

 

Cloud stiffened and he felt his face heat up. “What are you talking about?” He said defensively.

 

Advent chortled and straightened himself up. He gave Cloud a deadpan smile. “We’re the same person, Cloud. There is _literally_ no point in hiding your feelings.”

 

Cloud had to give Advent that much; he was right. Whatever feelings he had for Tifa, Advent felt the same exact way. “I mean I guess, it’s not like we were ever together or anything.” He finally admitted.

 

“Have you tried to find anyone? In the mansion I mean.” Cloud had hoped that Advent would drop the line of questioning and was disappointed when he didn’t.

 

“What? No, of course not.” It’s not like relationships _couldn’t_ work in the Smash Manor. Zelda and Link are inseparable, _everyone_ knew that the female Corrin twin had a huge crush on Rosalina, and hell, Shulk and Lucina were dating. Cloud just never found a reason to try to court anyone. Plus, as far as he knew, nobody was interested in him anyway. “Why do you keep asking about this stupid stuff?”

 

Advent sighed but then laughed sheepishly. “I just want to know if we’ve gotten lucky is all.”

 

Cloud whipped his head towards his clone and narrowed his eyes. “ _What?_ ” Was all he could managed to say. Seriously, _what?_

 

Advent burst into laughter and wiped a tear from his eyes. “I mean even though we’re the same person, we’re not the same being. There are experiences you’ve had that I haven’t. I was just curious.” He fell back onto the bed. “I mean, we’re not bad looking guys.” He paused for a moment before adding nonchalantly, “I mean, I’d fuck me.”

 

Cloud turned around and looked him in the eyes. He opened his mouth to say something, but couldn’t think of anything to say. He was starting to regret inviting Advent over.

 

Advent smirked. “And seeing as we’re the same person, you probably feel the same way, don’t you Cloud?”

 

Again, Cloud opened his mouth to say something but was unable to find words. It’s true that he found himself attractive but would he _really_ sleep with himself? The fact that he even had to think about what the answer may be concerned him.

 

Advent sat up and propped himself up using an elbow. “The lack of an answer means yes, doesn’t it?” Mischief flamed to life in his blue eyes and Cloud suddenly felt _very_ uncomfortable. Again, he felt his cheeks heat up and found himself avoiding Advent’s eyes.

 

“I-I mean maybe?” He stuttered. “If the opportunity arose I guess but I never really tho-” He stopped himself mid-sentence, realizing what he had just said. And by the look on Advent’s face, he had picked up on it too.

 

“’If an opportunity arose’, you say?” He sat up, and his voice suddenly lost the joviality it had. He tenderly placed his hand on Cloud’s and Cloud found himself blushing more than before. “I’m here, right now. If you want…” His voice trailed off and his cheeks turned pink as well.

 

Well this wasn’t a situation Cloud _ever_ thought he would find himself in. But he couldn’t say he disliked it? Everything about it seemed so wrong and yet…

 

“Okay.” He finally nodded in agreement. He was shocked how easily the word came out; there was no hesitation when he made the decision. His heart was beating so hard, he was sure Advent could hear it.

 

“O-okay.” Advent repeated a bit shakily. The two stared at each other in silence, as a sort of tension built between the two of them.

 

Advent eventually started to move his head slowly towards Cloud’s. All the hairs on Cloud’s body stood on end as their lips finally met. Instinctively closing his eyes, he quickly found himself returning the kiss. As the two of them remained locked together, Advent leaned further up against Cloud’s body, making him fall back against the headboard of the bed.

 

The two finally separated with a quiet gasp. They looked into each other’s eyes briefly before Advent kissed Cloud once more. This time there was no sense of hesitation or uncertainty to the action; Advent wrapped his arms around Cloud’s head and shoulders to pull him in closer. Cloud didn’t even notice when his companion turned lover slipped his tongue into his mouth, but he happily returned the favor.

 

Disconnecting once more, Advent fumbled with the belts and straps wrapped around Cloud’s torso. With incredible ease, he pulled them of and tossed them to the floor and in seemingly the same motion pulled Cloud’s shirt up over his head.

 

“Damn, I’m good looking.” Advent smirked deviously.

 

“Shut up.” Cloud moaned through a chuckle.

 

“Make me shut up.” Advent challenged, as he removed his own shoulder guard and tossed it aside.

 

“Gladly.” With a grunt, Cloud sat himself back up causing Advent to fall on his back. Advent squeaked quietly in surprise, as if he hadn’t expected Cloud to actually take him up on his offer. It was really cute, actually.

 

Both of them panting now, Cloud supported himself on all fours. He shuddered when Advent gently traced one of the many scars on his chest with his finger.  When had he taken off his gloves? “This is so weird.” He said absently.

 

“You’re telling me.” Cloud muttered as he began undoing Advent’s cloak. So many zippers and straps, it was annoying to work with. “God, this thing is so needlessly complicated. Why do we wear this again?”

 

“Let me sit up, I’ll do it.” Obliging, Cloud moved back as Advent sat up and removed the cloak himself. The moment it hit the floor, Advent lunged at Cloud, retaking his place on top. He kissed Cloud deeply and Cloud wrapped his arms around him, digging his nails into his skin, pulling him closer.

 

Advent broke the embrace and smiled before targeting Cloud’s neck. Little kisses and bites caused Cloud to moan involuntarily. Advent understandably knew all the places that would make him weak and was taking full advantage of that knowledge.

 

In an attempt to get back at him, Cloud thrust his hand down his replica’s pants. He gripped his rigged member, causing Advent to moan into his neck. Cloud attempted to stroke it, but found it difficult due to Advent’s pants and underwear getting in the way. He gripped the sides of his trousers and pulled down. Advent adjusted himself slightly to help kick them to the ground.

 

Advent’s rod now free, Cloud gripped it again and began to stroke it. Knowing exactly how he liked it to be done, he deliberately teased him by slowing down and speeding up at inopportune times. As Advent neared climax, he bit into Cloud’s shoulder. It hurt a bit, but Cloud didn’t care at all.

 

“W-wait.” He suddenly breathed into his ear. The voice was so quiet and gentle, it gave Cloud goosebumps. Cloud stopped stroking, Advent’s cock dripping in pre-cum. “I want to finish in your mouth.”

 

A bit surprised, it took a second for Cloud to nod in agreement. It’s not like he’d never done this before. Briefly, long forgotten memories of his first year back in Midgar came flooding back, but he pushed them away.

The two of them switched position, and Cloud kicked off his pants in the process.  With Advent now resting against the bed’s headboard, Cloud lowered his head and took his clone’s manhood into his mouth. It tasted salty, but it wasn’t a taste that he disliked exactly.

 

“Fuck.” Advent groaned. He grabbed the back of Cloud’s head, pushing his head down and forcing him to take his whole length at once, causing the blond to gag. Advent noticed his discomfort and removed his hand, muttering an apology.

 

“It’s fine.” Cloud replied, placing a gentle kiss to the member’s head, making Advent shudder in ecstasy. He slowly engulfed it in his mouth again. His head bobbed up and down, and his firmly grasped hand followed the motions of his head as he stroked Advent’s cock. Every now and again, he would use his other free hand to gently massage his companion’s balls, which would cause Advent to moan louder than usual.

 

Suddenly, Cloud felt his head be pushed down again and the next instance a salty taste filled mouth. He lifted his head when Advent’s hand fell to the wayside and a bit begrudgingly swallowed the ejaculate in his mouth. He noticed a tiny bit left over on the cock’s head and gently licked it up. Wiping some spit that had trailed down the side of his mouth, he looked up at Advent

 

He was panting heavily, a smile on his face. “Holy shit, that was great.” He turned to Cloud as he moved up to the head of the bed and rested on a pillow. “I didn’t realize how good we were at doing that.” They stayed in a content silence until Advent’s breathing evened out.

 

He turned over and kissed Cloud gently on his lips. “Now it’s my time to return the favor.”

 

“Wha-” Cloud barely had time to react before Advent was on top of him again. He placed a finger to Cloud’s lips and grinned.

 

“Stay right here.” He said playfully, running some fingers through Cloud’s messy blond locks.

 

He swung his feet over the side of the bed and stood up. In the dimly lit room, Cloud followed him with his eyes to a set of drawers.

 

“Now if I remember correctly it should be right… ah ha!” Before Cloud even saw what Advent had found, he knew exactly what it was and his heart skipped a beat at the realization.

 

Advent waltzed back over to the bed, and sat down. He spread some of the lubricant over his hands before placing the bottle on the bedside table.

 

Placing gentle pecks all over Cloud’s chest, he grasped his manhood, which was now only half hard. It didn’t take more than a few moments of light massaging to make it fully erect again. Although he was mainly using his hands, Advent would occasionally place gentle kisses on its head.

 

Cloud’s vision was going fuzzy when Advent stopped stroking. Momentarily confused, he felt his heart race when he slid his hands under his backside. Following an unspoken command, Cloud turned onto his side. Advent pressed his body against his, spooning him.

 

“Is this okay?” Advent asked quietly.

 

“Y-yeah.” Cloud responded somewhat nervously.

 

“Alright.” Advent kissed the back of his head. He slowly ran his hand down Cloud’s back, before finally stopping at his ass. He reached to the bedside table and applied more lube to his hands.

 

Cloud gasped through clenched teeth as Advent began to massage his entrance. He gasped and groaned when Advent inserted a finger, but quickly succumbed to an immense feeling of pleasure as he began to massage his inside. He yelled out in surprise when a second finger was added and bit the comforter to suppress even more yells until the pain melted away into pleasure.

 

Minutes passed and Advent removed his fingers. “Okay, ready?” He muttered to Cloud. Nodding, Cloud rolled onto his stomach and propped himself up with his elbows and knees. He glanced over at his clone, and saw him slather lubricant onto his member.

 

Advent crawled up behind Cloud and grabbed his hips to position him better. Cloud moaned and bit his pillow as Advent slowly entered him. Once his length was fully inserted, he once more asked Cloud if he was okay. It hurt for right now, sure but he knew it would feel better in no time. He managed to squeak out a tiny yes before the first thrust made him yell loudly.

 

Advent went slowly at first, only moving once every few seconds. If Cloud sounded like he was in too much pain, he would stop and ask for confirmation that he wanted to continue. Sometimes, he would lean over and kiss Cloud’s back.

 

Over time, the pain that he felt ebbed away into pure pleasure. As his moans grew louder, the thrusting grew faster and more intense. It wasn’t long until Cloud was moaning his clone’s name and begging to be pounded faster. Advent grabbed him by the hair and pulled his head back, forcing them to make eye contact for a brief moment.

 

The only sounds to fill the room were the sounds of two bodies slapping together, moans and the sound of the bed creaking when Cloud suddenly yelled out. “Fuck, fuck, fuck, _fuck!”_ He closed his eyes as his vision went white and his whole body numbed as he climaxed all over himself and the bed.

 

A few moments later, Advent yelled in a similar way as he gripped Cloud’s hips so hard it hurt. Cloud moaned as he felt his insides get filled by Advent’s cum.

 

Cloud collapsed onto his stomach as Advent removed himself from him. His clone fell to side besides him, a dumb smile across his face and eyes closed. They both were breathing heavily, but their breaths were in sync with each other. Their bodies were close and seemed to stick together because of the amount of sweat all over them.

 

After catching his breath, Cloud turned to Advent prepared to ask the embarrassing question of if he would like to do this again some time. He didn’t get a chance to however; he was already fast asleep.

 

Sighing in content, Cloud turned onto his back. Closing his eyes, he realized that what just transpired was the most complex masturbation session he’d ever had before sleep overcame him.


End file.
